Bathroom Stall

Old hardware by soopahgrover.

Alleke ran ahead of me down the echoey hallway, and I helped her push open the swinging door into the men's bathroom. Before I could say anything she had closed herself in one of the stalls and said, "I can do it myself, Daddy." I watched from the outside as the small medal disk next to the door latch rotated and locked into place.

"You just locked the door," I said in astonishment. I was a little miffed. "I can't help you until you unlock the door again," I warned her.

As I paced back and forth in front of the bathroom stalls listening to Alleke cheerfully singing "En la granja de Pepito," I realized that on the surface level I was more than happy to do nothing and let my daughter do her business by herself.

On a much deeper level, however, I realized that my daughter had just closed me out of another little compartment in her life. "I can do it, Daddy," Alleke would say about something we were doing together, and that meant she didn't need me to help her anymore. I needed to let one more little bit of her go.

Someday when she was older, I thought, she might only come to visit me once a year if I was lucky. (So sorry Mom and Dad for being that son!)

With two little kids at home, my life is a grocery cart full of responsibilities. I'm relieved when Alleke can do something for herself because it means more freedom for me. But, as my parents like to say, "Enjoy these years while they last, because once they're gone, they're really gone."

Ambassador

October 2 - David C. Jacobson - U.S. Ambassador to Canada by US Mission Canada.

After Teo was born in mid November, my family appointed me as the official ambassador of the Democratic Republic of Teo. April, especially, seemed only concerned about homeland security, in other words what happened inside the four walls of our apartment.

Stepping through our front door seemed as intimidating as having to go through customs, and this world beyond was now a separate society, across the border, left to be dealt with by an official representative like me.

I felt bad for our friends who started to miss April. They began to call and ask for her, or write emails with something in the subject line like "This email is for April," but they always had to talk to me first because, after all, I was the ambassador of the Democratic Republic of Teo.

As the ambassador, I did not like having to tell our friends over and over that April was too busy, or showing up at a friend's house by myself again. The truth was April did not seem capable of caring about the well-being of anyone except for the four citizens of our small state.

At first I thought April was being heartless and unsympathetic, but as time went on, I began to see that this was the work of a mother. She protects her young. It's strange to think that hormones and instinct probably had more to do with her focused attention than a personal decision. This was the natural course of things.

Now I greatly appreciate April's willingness to put her life on hold to care for Teo. I marvel at how her instinct told her to protect our little ones at all costs.

I don't mind being the ambassador because I know April's got a good health care plan in place for Teo.

Werewolf

Every time our friend Laura comes over, she looks at Teo like he's a steak dinner. She has an appetite for holding babies, and she's always so appreciative that we are willing to share him with her, which is just the way April and I want it to be, since in all honesty we would let the mailman hold the baby if he was willing.

April had a great idea the other day. She said, "I know, Laura, you can change Teo's diaper," and when Laura's eyes lit up, April added, "and Kelly can show you how."

So, while April sat on the couch and watched TV, I supervised Laura at the changing table. I didn't say much because I thought it would be more entertaining to watch her figure out how to change the diaper by herself. Also, in some twisted way it seemed therapeutic to watch someone else, completely unaware of what was about to happen to her, suffer the same way I've suffered changing diapers every day of my son's life.

See what Laura didn't know, and what most people would find difficult to believe is that my son Teo is actually a werewolf. As soon as Laura would open that diaper, he would start howling at the moon and pawing at her hands and trying to escape.

That's not what happened, however. Teo didn't turn into a werewolf. He stayed a little boy, and he smiled and even giggled at Laura as she changed his diaper. The difference was Laura didn't treat him like a wild animal like I do. I always feel like a zoo keeper getting in the cage with a wild animal, and my thinking is this: "Teo, this isn't a pleasant experience for either of us, so let's get it over with as soon as possible."

Watching Laura change Teo's diaper, on the other hand, was like watching someone get a pedicure. She played with his feet, and they chatted, and she gently took off his diaper without him even noticing.

"You did pretty well for a beginner," I told Laura as she lifted Teo into her arms and we left the room.

Later that day, when it was my turn to change Teo's diaper, I tried giving our little werewolf a pedicure, and he was all smiles.

San Miguel

Alleke bowed her head reverently and folded her hands above her plate.

"Dear God, thank you for my cousin Josie and my cousin Emma and my cousin DJ and my cousin Charlie."

She lifted her head and peeked at the people sitting around the table.

"Thank you for mama and for Teo and for daddy and for my friend Amy," she continued, naming each person.

Once again she bowed her head and closed her eyes. "Help me drink and help me eat," she prayed, and then, as an afterthought, she added, "and help daddy drink beer. Amen."

Lipstick

Before I had even set down the grocery bags and closed the front door, Alleke had scrambled off the couch and latched onto my leg. "Daddy," she squealed.

"See," she said, pointing at her lips, shiny as a chrome bumper. "I did it myself," she added, now pointing at the lipstick sitting on the arm of the couch next to her aunt Aunt Heidi, who coincidentially also had shiny bumper lips.

"I'm a grown up now," Alleke assured me, "but I'm still three."

It's only a matter of time, I thought, with a sigh.

Teo Smiles

This video is guaranteed to make babies smile.



I just showed this video to Teo twice, and both times he couldn't stop smiling at himself. I guess he's a perfectly healthy, egocentric, baby.

Xbox 360

Rick is my brother-in-law. He's home from college for Christmas break, and he's been a permanent fixture in the basement playing Modern Warfare 2 on his Xbox 360.

I had to laugh this morning when Heidi, my sister-in-law, and her boyfriend Josh were sitting at the kitchen table and my dad-in-law popped his head around the corner.

"Josh, do you know how to play video games?" he asked.

Josh shrugged and said, "Yeah."

"Good," my dad-in-law said. "Go downstairs and kill Rick."